yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
