haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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