Grow some girl-balls and come out already
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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