I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
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