umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Randomize
