I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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