last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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