I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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