you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
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