It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
