I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
