it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
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