You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
