Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
third nipple confirmed
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
