I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
