her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
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