tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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