Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
