I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
lets start a swedish sibling band together
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
