Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
