plz talk dirty to me
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
