Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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