she was so not down for the gang bang
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
