he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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