He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
