3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Randomize
