never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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