But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
