i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Randomize
