jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
