just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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