im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
My liver is preforming stress tests.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
