I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
