Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
