Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I need help removing her.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
