I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
