Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
