i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
