I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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