I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
