Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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