One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize