I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
He? As in you personified your dick?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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