I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
