Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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