I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize