Well apparently he's into motor boating.
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
