She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
