he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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