3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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