I feel great
I just peed on a car
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize